5 Quick Things I’ve Proud of This Year (in terms of being with sex addict)

For the past few months, maybe longer, I have stopped looking at women jealously. There was a time where everywhere I looked, adn I mean everywhere, I only saw women who were better than me. They may be prettier, thinner, better eyelashes, funnier, smarter – whatever. I’m not gay, but I couldn’t stop looking at women. I objectified them. I’m done with that, like the headache that drove you nuts and then somehow, somewhere vanished.

Permission to be confused

I went to one on one therapy last week. My brain is driving me nuts..what should I do? Why am I so weak? Why would I want my friends to leave their partners if they were in this situation and yet I can’t? Am I making a mistake leaving? Are my expectations too high (sex addiction aside)? Why was I attracted to a sex addict? How did I not know? How will I know the next time? Will my jealousy always be like this? How will I ever trust? Why am I still so confused?

Sad.

I’m sad today.  I’ve started to look for places to live.  I’m sad because I can’t find anything with wow factor.  I guess it’s hard to go from home owner to -at the landlord’s mercy – renter again.
I’m sad because Bob can’t be the person I want him to be or the person I thought [...]

HPV, Precancer, surgery & sex addict

Well, I went for surgery yesterday to remove part of my cervix in a LEEP procedure.  Bob went with me and was very upset by “what he’s created.” 
The surgery was not painful – only mild cramping afterwards – like the early years when you get your period for the first time.  The reprocussions are:  I [...]

Partners: What’s the worst part of sex addiction?

Still having a bad day…

Still think he’s up to something.  Not sure why I think that exactly.  Intution?  Paranoia?
He just got back from a 4 night business trip and he’s in a good mood – it’s odd to see him smile, chat and laugh.  Makes me wonder. 
He’s at his group tonight – hope it goes well.  But he could [...]

Found Partner of Sex Addict Groups!!!

Finally, found groups.  They are so underground and hard to find.  Bob brought a Recovering Couples Anon (RCA) pamphlet home that he picked-up in his SLAA meetings.
I finally called and talked to someone to find out location and details etc.  It was sooooooooooo nice to actually speak with someone in real life who has been [...]

Who Am I Becoming? Partners of Sex Addicts

Not surprisingly, this sex addiction has rubbed me raw in emotions.  I have changed these past 3 months and into someone I do not know or particularly like.
I am angry at Bob and angry with myself for not walking away and for sometimes wanting to walk away. For both. 
I am jealous and not jealous.  Sometimes, most [...]

10 weeks after learning my BF is a sex addict

Wow, 10 weeks…a lot has changed for me, Bob and his family.
The shock has definately worn off and I’m looking at things more clearly now.  I’m wondering if I’m up for a life of always wondering.  Like this week for example, we’ve had sex once (usually it’s at least 3) and I wonder.  I don’t [...]

The angry recovering sex addict…

Bob has always seemed nice and charming and to be honest I’ve never seen him truly angry.  Agitated yes, angry no.
He came back from a business trip at 1.30am Thursday night (Friday morning).  I was sleeping and he asked me for sex.  I said I was tired and I had to get up at 5am to [...]

Traveling for work … the hotel ritual

Well here is a big Hoorah!!!
Bob went to a hotel for a night, for work and we were both worried about it.  In the past he had done a lot of masterbating, looking at porn on his computer (not movies), cybersexing and talking to random women he met during cybersex activities or on dating sites.  [...]